Somebody please help me. I am really close with my big cousin and we have always had a connection. I am 15 and he is 17 and we have quite a big family so there is quite a lot of family get-togethers.
Since I was 15 he has been looking me up and down and feeling my bum when we hug and sliding his hand up my leg and I kinda liked it. He even did under the dinner table and I got really horny and some of my family suspected something and I often got quite awkward. So I decided it had to stop, so after dinner one night I took him up to my room so we could talk in private and I was about to ask him to stop doing it when he got the wrong idea why I’d taken him to my room so he started kissing me and rubbing my area and he slipped his hand down my trousers and started poking me.
I couldn’t bring myself to ask him to stop so after that he took his trousers down and asked for me to give him oral s*x, so I did and he put me on the bed and got on top of me and took my skirt up and my underwear down and had s*x with me.
It started to become a frequent thing every time we got together, but after a while our family started to suspect something and kept us apart, put us at separate ends of the table etc. but we always managed to get together again and have s*x. Now, it happened at birthdays and at weddings.
I knew it was wrong and I want it to stop but when I’m there I just can’t bring myself to ask him not to.
So, it keeps happening and I feel like I have no control over it. I have gone on the pill since this started because I always know its going to happen. But, I need it to stop. How do I stop it because I can’t? Please, help me.